I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
