Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
These People Made Expensive Mistakes That They’ll Regret Forever
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Things The Opposite Sex Just Doesn’t Understand
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml