Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Randomize
