I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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