She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
