ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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