He felt like a one man threesome
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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