so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
