your thong is hanging out like whoa
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
