The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
