if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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