the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
