Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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