ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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