Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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