I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
