his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize
