Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize
