Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
Randomize
