We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
