Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
