Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
