I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
there is glitter all over my balls
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
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