Banned from zoo.
Again?
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize