my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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