Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Randomize
