id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
What a dumb baby whore.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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