Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
Randomize
