Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
