She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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