I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
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