I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Randomize
