He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
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