I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Randomize
