what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
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