Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
