actually, I'm a sock model
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize
