Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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