great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Randomize
