dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Randomize
