that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
Randomize
