Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
