Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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