Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
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