I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
