HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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