You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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