I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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