I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
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