do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
